Building Self Worth Through Self Love

I know what you’re thinking, but no, not that kind of self-love. I’m talking about something commonly overlooked, but much more important. So important in fact, that simply knowing this will change your outlook on goals and dating forever. Ask yourself: do you feel incomplete?

We date for a few solid reasons: attraction, chemistry, companionship, not to mention that feeling that makes you need to sit down and place a jacket on your lap. But how often do you date women because you feel they’d fulfil this need for companionship, this deep-seated desire to feel complete? How often do you find yourself happier in a speed dating than when you’re alone? This feeling my good man – is a lie.

Too often do men Jump into relationships for the express purpose of having someone who cares. I’m here to tell you that this is a really shitty reason, and if you, like I was, are guilty of this, you really need help. ASAP. Don’t panic, I’m a doctor! (I’m not really a doctor.)

Let’s get cracking, shall we?

‘You complete me’, ‘you’re my other half’ and ‘we’re soul mates’, blah blah blah. Men (who would never admit it) and women alike have a tendency to churn out these cliches. ‘Well It’s a popular view so it must be true, right?’ Wrong.

Yeah I said it. I just laughed in the face of one of society’s most legendary cliché ideas, and while I’ll catch hell from hopeless romantics, I’m sticking to this view.

There Is No Other Half

There is no one out there who can fill the holes in your life, no one who can truly erase the ‘I’ve hit-rock-bottom’ syndrome that even the manliest men inevitably experience. Before I start to sound like the harbinger of doom, let me give you the good news:

YOU Are The Other Half

Close your eyes for a second and think of every huge goal you’ve wanted to achieve in life, but simply couldn’t succeed. Now open your eyes to the reality:

You Can Achieve Them ALL

Why do you need someone to be your “other half”? Why do we convince ourselves that we need to seek love and approval from someone to feel good? Here’s why: we don’t love ourselves enough. Go ahead and give yourself a pat on the back.

Why? Because you don’t need to wait for someone to do it for you.

Stop thinking “nobody gives a shit, I won’t succeed” ’cause guess what? You are the one who gives a shit. You are the one who cares whether you achieve or not. You can fix this down-and-out mentality starting right now, grab a pen and page ’cause I’m about to unleash a brainstorm up in here:

Think of everything you dislike about yourself that can be changed.

Write it all down.

Find the most immediate thing you can change, and starting this moment, change it.

Strike it off your list and find another thing to change.

Repeat the process ’til you’ve accomplished all.

And there you have it. Self-love is as easy as that. By changing one thing at a time, no matter how little, you’ve Just become a better man. You’ve just achieved a goal. By the time you’re done reading this, you’ll be an achiever, how cool is that?

There isn’t any woman who will complete you. Human beings aren’t pieces in a puzzle to be placed together and ‘voila, the magic happens’, no. To be complete, we have to approve of ourselves, our goals, our capabilities, and our status as MEN. When you love yourself – you achieve – when you achieve -you become a success – when you’re successful – you’re happy.

Take care of yourself!

It’s okay to be a little selfish when you’re trying to create a better life for yourself.

Think of a relationship as the union of two “wholes”. Not halves. When you are a whole and complete man, that’s when you can share true happiness with a woman. That’s when women will have more interest in you.